Dating versus Hanging Out

Dating has become a rare thing that occurs today. Couples tend hang out instead of going out on a date. My grandma says when she was growing up the boys asked girls on dates. When they went on dates, there was a plan. They got to know each other and had a good time. Elder Dallin H. Oaks gave a great talk about dating versus hanging out. He said, "Knowledgeable observers report that dating has nearly disappeared from college campuses and among young adults generally. It has been replaced by something called 'hanging out.'"

Is it important to date rather than hang out? Hanging out can be defined as a group of young men and young women getting together to join in a group activity. Hanging out is more casual. Dating is different because it is pairing off and getting to know each other on a one on one basis which can lead to a relationship and marriage in some cases. Elder Oaks gives great counsel to those that don't quite understand what a date should include. "A "date" must pass the test of three p’s: (1) planned ahead, (2) paid for, and (3) paired off." Dating can help you get to know someone better. If the boy has planned what time to pick his date up, the activities in the middle, and the time they will be home, one can assume he is a responsible young man. A girl could also assume her date is okay with not spending a lot of money if he plans a cheaper date such as horseback riding and a picnic or a date to go hiking. Dating is crucial in finding an eternal companion.

We are all here to progress towards eternal life. Our Heavenly Father wants us to be married and have children to give them the opportunity to come this earth. It's part of the plan and we will all have the opportunity in this life or the next, but we have to do our part in progressing with the Lord's plan. We can't find a companion without dating. Also in Elder Oaks talk he says, "My single young friends, we counsel you to channel your associations with the opposite sex into dating patterns that have the potential to mature into marriage, not hanging-out patterns that only have the prospect to mature into team sports like touch football. Marriage is not a group activity—at least, not until the children come along in goodly numbers." We can start preparing now for this wonderful opportunity. Get a good education, live a virtuous life, make every day count, get on your feet and move.